This challenge might be making me a little crazytown.
I've been increasingly more emotional everyday.. which is strange, because I'm not a very outright, openly emotional sort of gal.
(But let's be honest- for the last 5 years, I've been smoking to cover my emotions.)
I guess it's just strange that I can feel how much not working out for one day affects my mood.
I didn't do the challenge yesterday because I'm waiting for my disc to get here today.. And today, I'm feeling really lethargic and mopey.
Thank God today is practice.. And please God, don't let us do the damn snake drill the whole time- I really want to scrimmage. As a rookie, I need it. (I'm aware I need endurance and sprints and blahblahblah too... But this month is my class's Six Months skating! And dang it, I want to start learning how to play the game beyond our hometown bout.
Hmm... Anyway.
Yesterday I snacked, because I was up till 3am studying.
But, I snacked on two pieces of organic dark chocolate (thanks roomie!) and cashews.. plus like, 8 cups of black coffee- 3am is way past my bedtime.
My meals were okay.. Dinner was hurried- the roommate was making some squash business and therefore occupying the kitchen before my night class.
Today, will be better.. Even though I want to smoke a lot.
Things are happening in my life that are making me stress out a lot, and that makes me want to smoke a lot.
I thought I had $100 more dollars than I do.. But I don't.
I have $37, with which I have to pay dues.
Even though my last pair of jeans have a hole now.. and I'm not the best seamstress, so they're probably going to join the land of jeans with holes. I'd wear them to a derby function with like, fishnets or tights underneath... but I can't wear them to class or work.
I found out that I can't appeal my "you have too many credits" financial aid stuff again after this semester- But I have one more semester left. I mean, granted, I only have about 4 hours to finish after this semester... But I'll have to pay out of pocket for those 4 hours, and rent and gas and groceries, etcetcetc. I suppose it's time for a big-girl job- which I'll start looking for ASAP.
Perhaps the Humane Society. That could be fun... and they have benefits... and some of my Derby family work there... hm.
Regardless. I'm all emotional and crazytown, and skating will help.
Keep up the good work, sisters! We're doing awesome!
xox.
I really recognize the emotional thing. Hang in there sweets, you know you can do it. As for workout, I dread every day, cuz I am lazy by nature, but afterwards I feel sooooo damn good and proud. It really IS worth your time and effort. Especially when you want to be rostered (you'll be the agile strong one, see?) Derby Love! xox
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