Dear You.

I've been having some enlightening conversations with your fraternity brothers about you. Listening to them talk makes me wonder who you've become in my absence--because it's apparently not a good sort of person.

It makes me sad. The boy I fell in love with would watch the Sandlot with me until the wee hours of the morning. He'd be excited to hold my hand, and see my face, and hear my voice. The boy I fell in love with started becoming a man in front of my eyes. The man you started to become encouraged me to run away to the desert, and pursue something I was interested in, something I actually cared about for once in a long while.
But this boy... The one you are now, the one you're becoming, is only interested in the physical aspects of women. He calls his ex girlfriend a "prude" and lies about what they did or didn't do. He makes people believe that she isn't what she IS.
This boy assumes and judges and drinks and gains beer weight and hangs out with awful people who also drink their troubles away and only bitch about their problems instead of fixing them. This boy is hateful and rude and two-faced.

You are not the boy I fell in love with. You are not the boy I wanted to spend my life with, or kiss or hold or say "goodnight handsome" to every night.
You are becoming the kind of guy who will go to a bar, and get depressed because no one hits on you, and you'll go home alone and no, you won't get laid. Because no one wants to have sex with a hateful asshole who drinks away his pain.

You are now the boy who doesn't realize how lucky he was. I wanted to give it all to you, and I'm so glad I never did. Because this would hurt all that much more.

You are becoming someone who disgusts his friends... his ex friends... all the people he's snubbed because his drinking buddies - who aren't friends, mind you- are more important than the people who would be content just to be in your presence.

And I was.
Maybe I smothered you a little- but it's because I wanted to be around you. I wanted your fun-loving hilarious personality to rub off on me- and it did. I took the best of you with me when I crossed the ocean to find myself.

You told me to go. You said it was awesome. You encouraged me when I put on my big girl panties and dealt with my life.
And while I was gone, you took for granted the amazing woman I was becoming and dismissed me for girls 5 years younger than me, just to see if they'd fuck you.

Well, congratulations, Boy. You're alone, you're unhappy and you're disgusting all of the incredible people in your life.

Love for who you used to be,
Me.