the wedding singer is the devil..

I can only give you love that lasts forever,
And a promise to be near each time you call.
And the only heart I own
For you and you alone
That's all,
That's all...

I can only give you country walks in springtime
And a hand to hold when leaves begin to fall;
And a love whose burning light
Will warm the winter's night
That's all,
That's all.

There are those I am sure who have told you,
They would give you the world for a toy.
All I have are these arms to enfold you,
And a love time can never destroy.

If you're wondering what I'm asking in return, dear,
You'll be glad to know that my demands are small.
Say it's me that you'll adore,
For now and evermore
That's all,
That's all.



I have wedding fever.
Marriage fever.
Fever for commitment, security, life.....
I want what my grandparents had.
When my grandmother would get pissed at my papa and chase him around the kitchen with a skillet...
i now own that skillet.... I want to chase my husband with it.
Or at least have a husband.

Last night, marriage came up in conversation. Again.
My Penguin always shies away from it.
He's scared I guess.
I don't understand, you know?
He's the one that put this ridiculous idea in my head.


when he was drunk, he mentioned this file he had on his old laptop- (which is now fried...).. full of all the things he'd say to my dad when they had The Talk.
That he knew he couldn't just ask me- he has to ask my dad first.
But then, drunkenly, got very sad he couldn't afford a ring- a nice ring like I deserved.

This is his fault.

And now, he's scared? I do not understand.
Boys. BAH.

I mean, guess I understand, if I really think about it.
But love is not something you think logically about.
It is not something that finds on a graph in Excell.
And really, if you think about it too long- you'll talk yourself out of it...


i guess i'm just frustrated.
or impatient.

probably the latter.

i think i'll go eat dinner now...

peace out.